Back to the Gym and Some Savory Soup

When I get overstressed, things tend to fall to the wayside. Over the past year or so, my gym time has definitely suffered. On the contrary, my "Kim Kardashian: Hollywood' skills have grown remarkably strong as of late.

I'm trying to get back into the groove of things, which can be tough when you've lost a lot of strength (and the bruised ego that comes along with it). Yesterday was a bench press day, which I hate because it's my worst lift and I have to adapt to lower weights until it picks up. Lately I've been going by feel because I'm unsure of where I'm at. Benching especially sucks because you have to start at the bar, which is 45lbs, and I don't have a lot of room to add weight at this point until I regain strength.

• Bench: Warmup sets of 5 with the bar (3 sets), increase by 5lbs until sets of 5 become difficult
• Dumbbell Rows: 3x15
• Tricep Pulldowns: 3x15
• Clean&Jerk: 3x5, done with little rest in between sets to build endurance
• Elliptical HIIT

Somewhere between unpacking more so I'm not living out of boxes for six months (which, given the opportunity, I will do), I made a batch of easy chicken minestrone soup in the slow cooker, which I put straight in the freezer so I have four meals ready whenever I need! I meant to snap a pic but it slipped my mind, but trust me...it looked (and smelled) delicious. Adapt this recipe to as little or as much as you want. Hate beans? No beans. Lots of celery? Go crazy. Need three times more noodles than normal people? I feel you, let's do it.

Simple Crockpot Chicken Minestrone

• 1lb boneless chicken breasts
• 4c chicken stock/broth
• 1 28oz can of undrained diced tomatoes (I get mine "Italian", already seasoned with basil/garlic/etc.)
• Veggies of your choice - onion, celery, carrots, potatoes, whatever works for you!
• Beans if desired; cannellini or even red kidney beans work well
• Noodles if desired: I use mini shells (1 cup or more, however noodly you like it!)

Stir the chicken (leave whole or cut in chunks, it doesn't matter), broth, tomatoes, and veggies into the crockpot. If you use something like zucchini or beans of any sort, don't put that in quite yet...save it until after. Throw some salt, pepper, or Italian seasoning in if you'd like, and cook on high for 3-4 hours or low from 7-9 hours. If you left the chicken whole, it will be tender enough to pull apart.

Stir in beans/zucchini and, if you plan to eat the whole thing immediately, noodles, and cook for another 10-15 minutes. If you plan on freezing it, let it cool to room temperature, add the noodles, and immediately freeze. This way, the noodles don't end up mushy blobs when reheated. I'd assume you could do the same with the beans as well so they don't get overly soggy!

Dior Addict Fluid Stick in "Kiss Me" and Sephora's Summer Surge!

As some of you know, from August 3-10 Sephora is holding their Summer Surge event that multiplies your points with purchase (with some additional goodies for those who qualify!). Beauty Insiders get 2x points, VIBs get 3x points, and VIB Rouge gets 4x the points for every purchase you make this week both in-store and online, no promo code needed. The girl I spoke to yesterday said that there will be special rewards going up online, although I haven't seen them yet. VIB Rouge...if your store still has them in stock...also gets a little tote and a makeup bag with samples. Mine had some of the usual throwaways, like perfume or mascara that doesn't work on me, but there were a few really great ones including a Laura Mercier Radiance Primer, Benefit Watts Up! highlighter, and Living Proof Perfect Hair Day Styling Treatment.

Summer Surge VIB Rouge Goodies!

I spent a lot of time wandering Sephora yesterday but only ended up with one thing (for now): Dior Addict Fluid Stick in "Kiss Me".

Dior Addict Fluid Stick in "Kiss Me"

I love love love this formula (also the darling packaging, how cute!), which is somewhere between a liquid lipstick and a gloss. "Kiss Me" looked like the perfect conservative shade to try out for school, a muted cool-toned pink. It's very close to a MLBB shade, but a little lighter. Because it is a lighter shade, it does settle into lip lines a bit, but nothing really noticeable unless you're up close, so definitely not a dealbreaker for me. Wear time is about what you'd expect from a gloss/lipstick hybrid.

"Kiss Me" - No Flash

"Kiss Me" - Flash

The no-flash swatch is definitely more true-to-life, if a little warm-toned...it's definitely not bubblegum pink, but the flash highlights the coolness of the color.

You can pick up "Kiss Me" ($35) or any other Fluid Sticks wherever Dior products are sold, but like I mentioned, Sephora is running that great Summer Surge event so it's definitely worth checking out there because of the 2x/3x/4x points offer!

Happy National Lipstick Day!

Because, obviously.

I always was (and still am) more of an eyeshadow person, but there's nothing like a fierce lipstick. A good lip can make or break your whole look, and I'm a firm believer that a bright lipstick equals a brighter day. Whenever I need to feel badass, I throw on a great lipstick; a bright pink, a fuchsia, a summery coral, a bold nude, a statement red. I know it can seem intimidating at first to wear an intense lip out, especially if you're not used to it, but from personal experience it brings out self-confidence that you may not have even thought you had!

Choosing a favorite lipstick is a little bit like choosing a favorite child, if you had, say, a hundred children. Yet there's one that I always have tucked away in my lipstick basket for those moments where I need to feel like, yeah, I'm a bad bitch. I bought it hesitantly, not just because it was pricey (lord knows I have no problem with that, I say as my wallet cries) but because I wasn't sure the color would suit me. It immediately became what I affectionately refer to as my "power lipstick". I use it rarely and for special occasions...I wore it to my college graduation, for example...because it's a little like my special secret weapon. Insta-fierce, just add lipstick.

Behold, Tom Ford "Violet Fatale":

You can't even see the "TF" in the lipstick anymore because it's so well-loved. I was afraid it would lean too purple on me, but it's just pink enough for me to pull off. Tom Ford has one of my favorite lipstick formulas, probably tied with Guerlain Rouge G, though they're both very much splurge purchases and I can't blame anyone for looking at the prices and shaking their heads. However, both formulas last essentially all day and sit comfortably, two things that I rarely find together in a lipstick, which is why they're top-tier products for me.

Guerlain Rouge G in Grenade from my Instagram

I had a longer "Celebration of Lipstick!" post planned, but that's going to be another time! I hope everyone celebrated National Lipstick Day, and if you haven't yet, there's still time!

What's your favorite lipstick?

Reanimating the Frankenblog: It's Alive!

I swear I'm going to start blogging again, with all of the blame directed at my friend Beth (whose blog Epise of Cake you should check out, y'all). Things are hectic right now...I'm moving this Wednesday and have basically nothing (read: actually, literally nothing) packed, or clean, or organized so no guarantees on how regular posts will be until things get set up and in some sort of routine, but I'm hoping this will help get me back on track with, well, life.

On the personal front, things with the boyfriend went pretty south...we're kind of "separated", not together but not really single, I guess?...and I'm living on my own next year. To say it's been devastating is an understatement. The past few weeks have been rough to say the very least, and I'm trying my best to get through them in one piece. I had to find an apartment on really short notice, and it's really at the very end of my budget, but I'm trying to stay optimistic.

However! I did get into pharmacy school and have orientation starting August 11th and classes starting the 18th, which is pretty cool and something I'm trying to use as a big positive to balance out the whole avalanche of negatives I've been bombarded by as of late.

The gym spent a lot of time at the back of my mind being so busy, and I'm working on getting back into that. I've lost a lot of strength that will hopefully come back at least moderately quickly. It's tough not to feel discouraged when I go.

I do have a whole ton of new makeup, though (of course), and look forward to making a whole bunch of great posts about that! I also have to learn how to dress myself because there's a dress code for school, and that will be an adventure.

To end things on a wonderful note and not just a wall-o-text, here is Waffles just doing Waffles.

My Lips...But Better

Every beauty junkie has her own personal mission to find the ideal, everyday lip product that just works with her natural lip shade, enhancing it without concealing it. In the beauty world, this shade or shades is referred to as MLBB...my lips but better. As much as I love bright, flashy lipsticks in fun, bold colors, there are plenty of times where I need a MLBB shade to either bring attention to the rest of my face or just for an everyday coverup. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten a ferret nip right on the lip that I want to just erase!

As of right now, I've found four amazing products that achieve that MLBB look, so I decided to do a fun little writeup of the products that I love and reach for often! My favorite four are:

• Guerlain Rouge Automatique in 100 Apres L'Ondee
• Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics Lip Tar in Memento
• NARS Velvet Matte Lip Pencil in Sex Machine
• YSL Rouge Volupte Shine in 08 Pink In Confidence

Guerlain, OCC, NARS, YSL

Guerlain's Rouge Automatique is a sheerer formula than their legendary Rouge Gs (which are one of my favorite full-coverage lipsticks ever), but it does a great job enhancing the natural lip color without overpowering it. The super-convenient packaging is also one of my favorites...slide the little button up and the lipstick pops out the top! 100 Apres L'Ondee is very close to my natural lip shade, so it's definitely a go-to for me!

OCC Lip Tars are fantastic, opaque, long wearing liquid lipsticks. You just need a little dab of liquid to cover your lips, and the formula will set and stay put for hours and hours. Memento is a rose-mauve that is slightly brighter than my lips and is definitely very opaque, but it's the only long-wearing full-coverage shade that I can put in the MLBB category so I love it for days when I won't have time for touch-ups.

NARS Velvet Matte lip pencil in Sex Machine was my very first MLBB color, as you can tell from the picture because it's certainly well-loved. I adore the simple pencil application, which is why this is a makeup bag staple for me. It hides all of the little flaws in my lips while giving a smooth, matte finish that is natural but lovely. I always, always have this one in my bag.

YSL Rouge Volupte Shines are sheerer but extremely hydrating lipstick that feels like a balm gliding on and leaves a wonderful shine. It's probably the most moisturizing and comfortable lipstick formula I've ever worn. 08 Pink in Confidence is a glossy MLBB shade, so it's perfect for days I want a subtle but shiny lip.

Guerlain, OCC, NARS, YSL (no flash)

 Guerlain, OCC, NARS, YSL (flash)

As you can tell, each shade has its own look that I can use to enhance when I'm not feeling a statement lip (which happens, I swear). Some are sheerer, while some are more opaque. I love all of them, though, and they each get heavy rotation in my makeup roster!

Feel free to share your favorite MLBB shade!

A Personal Post on Weight, Self-Esteem, and Hating the Way You Look

Today's going to be a bit of a personal post, which is something that I hesitate writing.

I struggle a lot with my weight. I'm never happy with the number on the scale, or what I look like. With the summer spent at home, I'm finding myself about 12-15lbs heavier than I usually am, and that's been stressing me out to the max. My clothes don't really fit anymore. I hate what I see in the mirror. I've even been putting off going to the gym because I hate the feeling that I'm the "fat girl at the gym". I liked it when I was more petite, going to the gym and lifting weights and feeling badass because I was so small lifting pretty big for my size. Now, I almost dread it. My gym clothes don't fit the way I like. My weights aren't nearly as good in regards to my size. I feel silly, stupid.

Realistically, I know I'm not medically overweight, even when I'm on the "heavier" end of my weight fluctuations like now. I'm "normal", which is something I cringe saying when I so desperately want to be "small". I also know that I'll probably never be content with what I look like. But the thing with severe body image issues (and the related disordered eating), is they can be...as silly as this sounds...debilitating. I find myself so depressed and anxious that I don't want to do anything, and that takes its toll on every aspect of my life, from the gym to my relationship to school. Food is not something you can just quit. You're stuck with it to survive. And it takes over your mind where it's all you can think about. Food, eating, how you look, how you feel like your fat rolls are pouring over the top of your pants.

I'm trying very hard not to resort to "just don't eat". For anyone who doesn't have experience with eating disorders, that sounds kind of ridiculous, but to me it sounds like such a "safe" and simple way to drop the weight I've put on, plus a little more. But I've worked so hard on my lifts to get where I am (which still doesn't feel like very far!), that the thought of my lifts going down so significantly is also unsettling. I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place; I can drop the weight unhealthily and get back to where I feel a little better about myself, but all of my hard work will suffer. Or, I can eat healthily and lose the weight slowly while keeping my lifts relatively stable, but deal with the tremendous anxiety of not losing enough weight right this moment.

It's going to be tough...trying to eat healthily but still enough, which my brain keeps yelling at me is too much too much. I just want to feel better, in every sense of the word, physically and mentally.

I'm going to post a few pics, which makes me uncomfortable, but that's the point. I have to get over that.

Deadlift day

New lipstick! Le Metier de Beaute in Thailand

I know I don't ever get a lot of readers, or comments, but if anyone has any advice, or stories to share, I would love to hear from you!

Tomorrow I'm planning a my-lips-but-better lipstick post, which is exciting!

Urban Decay Revolution Lipstick in Native

By now, most of you (or probably all of you!) have heard of Urban Decay's new Revolution lipstick line. With 22 fantastic shades, there's one...or more...for everyone. I fell in love with, say, at least half of them, and picked a few to try out the formula and I've been nothing but impressed! One of my most-used shades is the light pink Native, which works as a nice pinky-nude on me.

Gorgeous, isn't it? The packaging is a sleek purple-gunmetal, which is always lovely. The formula itself is creamy but not too thick, a little bit thinner than Too Faced's La Creme formula and with more slip.

Native (with flash)

Native (no flash)

As you can tell, it's definitely one of the lighter colors in the range, but for those of us who are crazy pale, it's perfect perfect perfect for a no-fuss goes-with-everything lip. Being such a light color, this shade in particular doesn't wear as long as the brighter colors (which have unbelievable wear time), but it's quite long-lasting and the formula isn't drying whatsoever so it's a dream to wear.

Native and all of the other shades ($22) can be purchased from Urban Decay's site, and all of the shades minus the two exclusive to UD's site (Protest and Strip) are at your local Sephora!